Sometimes in Life …

We want to read a book. Finish it in one go like a Pro. But sleep takes over at the most crucial stage.
We want maybe a white dress but our favorite shop with the most reasonable prices has a red one which makes us look horrible.
We want to go on a long drive all by ourselves to the most loved place but suddenly relatives tag along!
We want to have butterscotch ice-cream, but the vendor only has strawberry.
We want to be the first one to wish our best friend ‘Happy Birthday’. But, he/she is the biggest lazy bum and has to sleep right at 11:45. Pathetic! I know
We plan to be awesome in college, be the rockstar but end up watching stars at night in dismay.

Sometimes in life .. we want everything to be the way we want them to be …

Sometimes in life …

We plan to fulfill our dreams but the way seems tortuous, too tiring.
We plan to not fail. Completely forgetting that without the bottom ladders, a staircase would lead to nowhere.
We plan to be perfect. But we forget that perfection could be rote, predictable and boring.
We plan to climb mountains after mountains. But forget to rest; forget to regain energies, forget to build our mountaineering skills.

Sometimes in life …

Things are easy for a while and we slip into a comfort zone. And then life puts us into the ‘reality check zone’.
We never question the fullness. We only question the incompleteness.
We never stop preaching. But we always stop practicing.
We never stop begging to God for things. But we always forget to say ‘Thank You’.

Sometimes in life …

We question our situations.
We question the futileness of being good.
We question our own faith and purpose.
We question our hope.

Sometimes in life … We stop living. Because we stop BELIEVING.

… That, after all, these happen ‘sometimes’.
That, someone else has been through worse. And still manages to smile.
That, in the end, none of this will matter.
Because, the fight in us will still remain … Till the end

… And that’s what matters!

Some things happen in life sometimes. But, they happen to everyone!

We may stop. Life won’t. Nature won’t. Time won’t. You know why?

Because … Some things in Life …

Always Go On.

INKed. And Swayed.

When I first thought about this blog post, I decided I will share my experiences and lessons from INK 2012. But – now all I want to write about is my best take away from the awesomeness called ‘INK Talks’.

There are times when a song just gets stuck into your psyche and sinks much deeper than any other song. And it is magical when you come across that song. For me – this happened during INK. Shankar Tucker came. He spoke. He conquered. And then he just swept everyone away with his fantastic music. He played the following video and I knew I’m going to love this song for ages to come. May be beyond. It is called ‘Kinara’.

The song goes :

Geela geela, dhuaan dhuaan
Geela geela, dhuaan dhuaan…

Geela geela sa, dhuaan dhuaan sa
Khoya hua sa, behka hua sa..
Humsafar se milta yeh kinara.. bheega bheega
Sagar se gehra ye kinara … (2)

Deewano jaisa chahe woh sagar
Sunta hai lehron ki aahatein(2)
Sagar ki leher jaise baje iktara
Sajde mein uske hota hai kinara

Geela geela sa .. Dhuaan dhuaan sa ..

Sagar kinara jaise Kanha aur Radha
Kanha bin Radha kaise jeeye (2)
Kanha se Radha, Radha se Kanha
Dono ki preet chamke banke ek taara ..

Geela geela sa .. Dhuaan dhuaan sa …

Never have I seen the relationship between the sea and the shore being described more beautifully. We read so much about how they love each other but cannot find consummation. But this song was like ‘sitting on the beach on a full moon night and watching the shores welcome the crashing waves with a joyful embrace; as if long lost lovers meet and again drift apart in a matter of a few seconds which for them is perhaps an eternity.’  Give it one more read and you would know.

INK was humbling. Inspiring. Beautiful. Moving. Fun. Frolic. Work. Friendship. It taught me the value of ‘adding value to the world’, giving back more than you have received, following your dreams and passions; INK has taught me that your life is about the impact you create; be it on one person or a million.

INK has given me this song ; which is ‘love’. And that’s what makes the whole world move. Enjoy the song!

 

My Happiness Jar

I started my happiness jar recently; And every time something really happy happens, I add a word in it. Just to keep a record of how beautiful a few days were that went by. Try it. Colorful little chits that hold memories of colorful days of life.

As I started to add to it daily, I couldn’t help but realize that it really were the small small things in a day that made me the happiest : met a friend after ages, had a good day of work, came up with some brilliant ideas & implemented some, came across some real good inspiration and felt moved, got some really good praise & felt appreciated. Small things. Big smiles :D

There was love in each little happiness. Even when it was work related, it was the love of doing something I liked doing. We often question the super power called ‘love’ & its abilities to move the world, set things straight, bring smiles, make us feel good. All my questions got answered when I got the chance to attend INK 2012 at Pune in October this year. It is said that when you really seek an answer, it will present itself to you in the most unexpected way possible. I will tell you how:

I went as a volunteer and the whole volunteer pool was allowed to attend the opening day of INK. Brilliant! Glad that I got to listen to maybe the best of the lot of speakers and fellows on the 1st day itself. Have even shared the Awesome Shankar Tucker’s The Awesome song (in my opinion) in my previous post. But there are things that move you differently.  Sometimes, you get caught unawares and things blow you away when you least expect.

One of the speakers at INK was Dr. Nitin Ron, a neonatalogist and a mountaineer. Queer combination isn’t it. But when he started speaking, every word made my being at INK ‘worth it’. Here was a doctor who healed premature babies and helped them live on. And he was telling a full house that science wasn’t enough maybe. Love & compassion played a very very important part in their healing. The stories of miracles which happened at his hospital moved everyone in the audience. It moved them, I’m sure, from a position of doubt (if any) to a position of concrete belief that love heals. Perhaps faster than time. His talk can be viewed here – Nitin Ron at INK

Anyway, coming back to why I started writing this post – I was trying to just figure out what love is for me. And I found out that -

Love is about having that one special person in your life who is ‘the sin qua non(sole purpose) of your existence’. Yet, it is also about  NOT HAVING that one person, because then you find many people who make it worth it – in their own different and beautiful ways! (simply put – it means love can also be there in your life while you enjoy singlehood) ;)

Love is when you can be silent and yet have a beautiful conversation with your own self. Only you know best; who it is that you love most and what you could do for them. I have realized; it is really not important to talk always. Sometimes, you acknowledge someone’s presence more in silence. Because then it means that the person makes you comfortable in your own skin.

Love is when I hold my best friend’s hand and give her a tight hug when I meet her after ages. Love is when I crack the silliest jokes with her and an instant flashback happens. Love is also when I scream with rage at another bestie whom I couldn’t meet. Love is weird really.

Love is when I care like a child for a few people who inspire me and are the reason I am what I am today. Love is when my mom makes the best things in the world for me yet keeps scolding me for some reason or the other. Love is when dad cracks a joke about me getting married and I get angry and then he cracks another joke to make me laugh. Love is when my always silent brother talks so much in front of me that I have to ask him to keep quiet! And mom says, “stay back. At least he talks when you are around.”

Love is when we release sky lanterns with a hope that there is a better tomorrow for all of us. Love is also when we release sky lanterns because we find them beautiful without any reason.

Love is when I realize that there is someone who cares for me so much that I am convinced nothing will ever go wrong with me.

Love is when I unknowingly crack the shittiest jokes and suddenly the whole atmosphere around lights up. Love is when my mom joins me in those silly jokes.

Love is when I realize that I have one person with to whom I do not have to write my inhibitions and emotions. Love is when I know that I’m so comfortable with her that I can say things to her which I will probable share in writing with others :)

Love is also when I read a beautiful book and it just makes my day and night and a few more days to come.

Love is happiness. Inside my little jar. In small words and their big meanings. Inside my Happiness Jar.

An excerpt from the book ‘This Is All I Have To Say’ by Swapan Seth; on Love (A serious recommendation that this book be read. If nothing, it will make you smile like an idiot for an hour after you shut it). You may ask why this excerpt. Because – you always need to be open to love & not close your heart. Whatever might have happened ever, never forget to love. Because that is all that matters. Read on :

Suddenly from a crowd of people, it will spot you.
Lurking as it invariably does behind a curtain of hesitation. Wondering whether you will recognize it or reciprocate it.
If it makes you skip a beat, go out and embrace it.
Love is life’s glue. It is what binds people.
Love with desire. Love with dignity. And love deeply.
Love fiercely. And love fairly.
Many are lucky in love. And many are unlucky.
Don’t worry about that. You will fall in and out of love.
Love is unreliable.
It has many disguises that confuse people.
Get confused. Get deceived.
But don’t get cynical about love.
It takes its time to find you.
It searches the universe before it gets to you.
And when its true face stares at you in the eye,
Hug it and make it your friend.
Because love is a life long companion.
Not everyone is lucky to have it.
Most people tuck away their love in their hearts.
Wear yours on your sleeve.
But be unfaithful.
Love many things.
Love your family. Love your friends.
Love your interests. love your work. Love a book.
Love a tune. Love a poem. Love a wine.
Love a flower. Love a work of art. Love a smell.
Love a place. And be generous with your love.
The more you will give, the more you will get.
And love unconditionally. Love is not a contract.
It is merely an obligation to being alive.
And never expect love to come back in volumes in which you give it to others.
There’s always a little that spills as it journeys back to you.

Because, love isn’t about who was, is or will be there in your life. It is about who are YOU.

Choti Choti Baatein …

Somehow, the poems that I wrote in maximum 5 minutes are the ones I like the most from all my work. This too is one of them. Inspiration credits at the end :)

Logon ki zindagi mein, jaane kya kya ho jaata hai
Hum choti choti baaton pe rote hain

Koi raat raat bhar, bhooke pet so jaata hai
Hum namak kamm hone pe rote hain

Koi taaron ke saaye mein, zindagi bitata hai
Hum dewaaron ke rangon pe rote hain

Kisi ke paas tan dhaapne ko kuch bhi nahi hai
Hum bhari almaari dekh kar ‘Kapde nahi hai’ kehte hain 

Koi padhne ko school jaane ko, zindagi bhar taras jaata hai
Hum padhne ke naam se rote hain

Koi shikshak naa milne par, khud hee padh likh jaata hai
Hum marks, exams aur teachers ko sirf gaaliyaan dete hain

Koi baarish ke paani mein nach kar, dil ki pyaas bujhaata hai
Hum keechad ko dekh rote hain

Kisi ke paas apna kehne ko koi nahi hai
Hum pal bhar ke rishton pe rote hain

Kisi ke paas zindagi ke naam pe kuch nahi, fir bhi woh hansta hai
Hum hazaar khushiyon ke beech, chote se dukh pe rote hain

Logo ki zindagi mein, jaane kya kya ho jaata hai
Hum choti choti baaton pe rote hain …  


Inspiration credits : All those people who keep crying on their FB statuses :P

The choice of Purity.

Yet another story. Yet another lesson.

Source – FB

An elephant took a bath in a river and was walking on the road. When it neared a bridge, it saw a pig fully soaked in mud coming from the opposite direction. The elephant quietly moved to one side, allowed the dirty pig to pass and then continued its onward journey.

The unclean pig later spoke to its friends in arrogance, “See how big I am; even the elephant was afraid of me and moved to one side to let me pass”.

On hearing this, some elephants questioned their friend, the reason for its action. Was it out of fear?

The elephant smiled and replied, “I could have easily crushed the pig under my leg, but I was clean and the pig was very unclean. By crushing it, my leg will become dirty and I wanted to avoid it. Hence, I moved aside.”

This story reveals that realized souls will avoid contact with vulgarity, not out of fear, but out of desire to keep away from impurity though they are strong enough to destroy the impurity.

 

The Attention Equilibrium

Jose Ortegay Gasset: “Tell me to what you pay attention and I will tell you who you are.”

The teacher said, ‘Pay attention to the class’
Mom said, ‘Pay attention to the food’
Dad said, ‘Pay attention to studies’
Friend said, ‘Pay attention to me when I come out of the trial room’
Boyfriend / Girlfriend said, ‘Pay attention to me/ my nuances/ my small and stupid talk & remember everything’

No one really ever said ‘Pay attention to yourself’ / ‘Pay attention to being good’ … Sigh!

Result – all girls pay attention to (well, most girls) is – their shopping and boyfriends & probably grades (that too is tangential because mostly they dream of getting married to a rich guy and do more shopping. A threshold amount of ‘padhayi’ is important to catch hold of that richie rich).

And all guys dream about is – well! we all  know :P (Ok! Most of the guys. Not all)

We have kind of stopped paying attention to things that really need attention. MBA has taught me to be precise. So I’ll take it point wise.

1) When was the last time we paid attention to our goals in life? Like proper undivided attention. And by this I mean also paying attention to ‘how are we going to achieve it’ i.e. honing the skills needed. Dreaming day & night about what we want to become is fine. But we need to sharpen our axes to be able to take down the gigantic forests of ‘doubts & hurdles’ faster.

2) When was the last time we paid attention to someone who couldn’t do much for us but we could do a lot for them? Never quite understood why people go to help the society on their birthdays alone. Rest of the 364 days, the society and the downtrodden remain comfortably forgotten while we burn ourselves out on the dance floor, waste ourselves away in a pub/bar or splurge on things we never really need. Attention deficit disorder?

3) Ah! Relationships. My favorite :) … when was the last time we paid attention, like proper attention to the one we fell in love with? I am not saying one should only think about them 24x7x52 (I would be the last person to say that). Whatever little time we spent with our loved ones, how sincere were we with the amount of ears and concentration we lent?

4) When was the last time we decided, we will not just vegetate? When was the last time we thought of doing something for the first time? I met Mr. Kiruba Shankar  a few days ago and learnt some really awesome things in the very short meeting we had. He started rowing after college. Did not do sports during the entire 4 years. Yet, led his team to victory consecutively for 6 years (Read more). It is never late to start. Important is to start!

5) When was the last time we paid attention to ‘THINGS THAT SHOULD BE PAID ATTENTION’?

A lot of things will try to distort this attention equilibrium. It is up to us, how fast we get back to the equilibrium. Use a catalyst, shut down all external interventions or whatever. But maintaining this balance is very important.

To let the sweet smell of wet sand distract you for a moment is okay. To dance in the rain is great. But if these get too much attention and we dance in the rain every time they happen, all that happens is, we fall ill (After all, we are not the protagonists of Indian Television :P – they should be ambassadors of Durable batteries). Enjoy the beauty around, but keep your eyes on the summit. Go out & party. But come back and study/work (more than 100%).

Attention is a weird and stupid thing. But must of all it is stubborn. And needs a lot of attention :)  

 

I often commit mistakes …

I do not know whether it is a way of saying Sorry or saying I Love You. But, have always cherished these lines.

I often commit mistakes
Tell me when I am wrong
Punish me; if necessary
But do not foresake me please.
You may leave me feeling let down
But never leave me alone
You may not back me always
But never turn your back on me
Without your support...
I have no meaningful existence !

Looks more like forgiveness. Wanted to share a thing or two about the same.

 

Very few people can actually forgive. Forgiveness is more about forgetting and less about saying, “It’s OK.” Forgiveness as a value, is made for the one who forgives and not for the one who asks for it. You feel good when you forgive someone; and it is more than the relief that the other person feels.

The best way to ask for forgiveness is not expensive gifts / dinners. It is only a ‘Dil Say’ apology. If you cannot say it, write it. Nothing works better. But again, that is just my opinion ! Nothing in this world is worth enough, to lose the best people in our lives. And if your ego comes in between your sorry, may be you just don’t deserve that relationship … If no apology works, just send this poem :)

P.S – This poem has been taken from a book called ‘Divine Whispers’

The Love Thing

The title reminds me of the book ‘The thing called love’ … I faintly remember the story I guess. Correct me if I am wrong, it talks about ‘true love’ apparently. So many true loves around where the truth changes mirror every other day !

I was just remembering a few ‘so called’ ‘awesome’ love stories around me in the past few years. All had a pattern. First few days of courtship were like – ‘no one else in this world exists’ . After 3 months – ‘ok. I have other things to do’ . After that – ‘Dear ! why the hell do u exist’ :P

I am not sure if I am right or not, but I believe, every relationship needs a base of friendship. I am so reminded of the dialogue from the movie ‘Kuch Kuch Hota Hai’ which was - ‘Pyaar dosti hai. Agar woh meri sabse acchi dost nahi bann sakti, toh main ussey kabhi pyaar kar hee nahi sakta’ 

Arey ! call nahi kiya toh nahi kiya. Kisi aur ko dekh liya toh dekh liya. Late ho gaya toh ho gaya. Trust your better half with the fact that, however much he/she roams around, at the end he/she is going to come back to you. Because if he doesn’t, there might be no point in waiting /wasting time.

Life is not the thing to be wasted in trivialities. It is when these small and not at all important issues came up; that I also saw the worst of fights in the awesomest of relationships. Why give so much of an emotional hangover to the one person you are most emotionally attached to ? Why make the other person feel the knots of the strings you are attached with ?

Love, as I see it is much more than just being available for each other. It is more about being available for a 3rd reason as I was told by someone. And true it is. If your relationship doesn’t have a common purpose, making it work might just be a tough call, a drag.

Ok. Love is important. But life needs more. It is the things that love makes you do that constitute life. One could do wonders but not without purpose. Be it love. Be it life.

Being foolishly in love will take not take anyone, anywhere. Because, again I heard it somewhere :

Love is not the heart of life. It is just a part of life.

The day it is more love and less friendship in any relationship, is the day the love graph starts declining :)

Is this me ? I guess so …

I am not fond of very loud music…
Am I boring ? I guess so…

I am not fond of partying
Am I old fashioned ? May be…

I don’t drink or smoke or like those who do …
Am I backward ? Shayad …

I don’t talk much these days
Am I reserved ? Perhaps…

I talk quietly to my own self most of the times..
Am I busy ? It is for you to decide…

I write more than I talk…
Am I a recluse ? Whatever !

I like my birthdays to be a real quiet affair…
Am I not allowed to chose it to be so ? May be not…

I prefer to spend more on books than on clothes…
Am I a book worm ? I am :)

I am not much into fine dining.
Am I non – explorative ? Doesn’t matter …

I spend maximum of my Sundays at home
Am I not happening ? Theek hai koi baat nahi

Is this me ? I guess so..
Is there more to me ? Yes, I guess so…