Silhouette Memory

A little background:

It’s a poem that I came across while taking a walk down the memory lane. In a not-dusty corner of an old drawer (because, you know, mothers clean everything :P ) back at home, I found my dusty, yellowing old diary. It smells of old pages and childhood stupidities. And it also looks like my progress report, from literature that has appealed me as a naive kid to literature that has appealed me as a useless teenager :D

Not much progress, if I must say.

I found this poem among those pages. It was written in 2004 on a train journey back from a one day school trip to Bhubaneshwar (a luxury and a delight back then). The idea of listening to the ‘discourse’ of teachers back then somehow appealed to me a lot (kind of explains the career choice I have made for myself). And that’s why, one would have found me on that cold winter evening sharing a coop with a few teachers and some unwilling, reluctant friends whom I dragged along with me. Best 3 hrs of my life!

It was in this time, this era, that this poem was written. Patro Sir (our Odiya teacher) wrote this, in what seems like a thoughtful, ephemeral epoch which was inspired by an undisturbed seating beside the window with the cold winter wind stirring those deeply settled emotions. He retrieved it from the fathoms of his thoughts on paper in Odiya. And then Mishra Sir (English teacher) translated it for the benefit of the less able like me. I am having to assume that he knew Patro Sir fairly well (they are neighbors, till date) for the remark that “It’s almost as if I have written it.” had been made after he went through the translation. For only the one who knows the poet well can translate poetry with such accuracy. Rest is just speculation.

As for me, I quickly copied the poem because I knew there will be a day, far away from that day, when I would understand the poem. I am just glad I had access to paper that day. Needless to say, this was the best part of the trip.

Enough with the background. Here’s the poem:

Perhaps thou…
To this unification of time
These ecstasy and sensations
In this eternal kingship
Of rope
Will tie

Or

Being selfish
To the ingredients of solitary progress of longings
Gathering & gathering
Will wipe it out.

Today’s memory within
Tomorrow’s
Self centered endless deeds

But,

I will store in my mind
With secret care
In an iron box,
Or made of silver
In a gold covering
Today’s memory.

If I get relaxation,
From the materialistic world’s
Fixed routines
I shall open
Very often
In solitude,
When you will come
To my memory
In your present
Or past.

Your silhouette memory. 

~ U. C. Patro (Translated by Sribatsa Mishra)

P.S – For the ones with a challenged vocabulary, Silhouette [sil-oo-et] means an outline or a shape (for e.g. taking a picture against the sun would give you a beautiful silhouette. For reference, check the blog header.)

The Creation of the Teacher

Teachers are people who have always inspired me. Not only to be a teacher but also be better.

We curse our teachers (mostly math teachers :) ) But we are here today because they were there back then. Today when I realize how wrong it was to have spoken ill about them, I also realize that behind every success story and smiling picture, there is a teacher. He/she could be anyone. Anyone who inspires with their silent examples and living lessons.

Today is Guru Purnima. A festival where the Gurus are celebrated. Their existence is thanked for! I wrote a blog post on teachers last year. Here it is.

I just want to share this story today. A story of ‘How God created Teachers’. 

The Good Lord was creating teachers. It was His sixth day of ‘overtime’ and He knew that this was a tremendous responsibility for teachers would touch the lives of so many impressionable young children. An angel appeared to Him and said, “You are taking a long time to figure this one out.”

“Yes,” said the Lord, ” but have you read the specifications on this order?”

TEACHER:

…must stand above all students, yet be on their level
… must be able to do 180 things not connected with the subject being taught
… must run on coffee and leftovers,
… must communicate vital knowledge to all students daily and be right most of the time
… must have more time for others than for herself/himself
… must have a smile that can endure through pay cuts, problematic children, and worried parents
… must go on teaching when parents question every move and others are not supportive
… must have 6 pair of hands.

“Six pair of hands, ” said the angel, “that’s impossible”
“Well, ” said the Lord, ” it is not the hands that are the problem.  It is the three pairs of eyes that are presenting the most difficulty!”

The angel looked incredulous, ” Three pairs of eyes…on a standard model?”

The Lord nodded His head, ” One pair can see a student for what he is and not what others have labeled him as. Another pair of eyes is in the back of the teacher’s head to see what should not be seen, but what must be known. The eyes in the front are only to look at the child as he/she ‘acts out’ in order to reflect, ” I understand and I still believe in you”, without so much as saying a word to the child.”

“Lord, ” said the angel, ” this is a very large project and I think you should work on it tomorrow”.

“I can’t,” said the Lord, ” for I have come very close to creating something much like Myself. I have one that comes to work when he/she is sick…..teaches a class of children that do not want to learn….has a special place in his/her heart for children who are not his/her own…..understands the struggles of those who have difficulty….never takes the students for granted…”

The angel looked closely at the model the Lord was creating.
“It is too soft-hearted, ” said the angel.

“Yes,” said the Lord, ” but also tough, You can not imagine what this teacher can endure or do, if necessary”.

“Can this teacher think?” asked the angel.

“Not only think,” said the Lord,. “but reason and compromise.”

The angel came closer to have a better look at the model and ran his finger  over the teacher’s cheek.

“Well, Lord, ” said the angel, your job looks fine but there is a leak. I told you that you were putting too much into this model.  You can not imagine the stress that will be placed upon the teacher.”

The Lord moved in closer and lifted the drop of moisture from the teacher’s cheek.  It shone and glistened in the light.

“It is not a leak,” He said, “It is a tear.”

“A tear? What is that?” asked the angel, “What is a tear for?”

The Lord replied with great thought, ” It is for the joy and pride of seeing a child accomplish even the smallest task. It is for the loneliness of children who have a hard time to fit in and it is for compassion for the feelings of their parents. It comes from the pain of not being able to reach some children and the disappointment those children feel in themselves. It comes often when a teacher has been with a class for a year and must say good-bye to those students and get ready to welcome a new class.”

“My, ” said the angel, ” The tear thing is a great idea…You are a genius!!”
The Lord looked somber, “I didn’t put it there.”

Source : http://www.dltk-kids.com/school/poems_for_teachers.htm

Beautiful story isn’t it?

Thank you lord :)

Extremely happy today I am :) . Reasons:

1) The most awesomest news of the year… got a call from XIMB. yippeee :D

2) Made a few people proud with this small little achievement that will shape my life. I will convert it for you.

More than mine, it is an achievement for those who felt proud that I did it…who really wanted me to get through. I owe it to your prayers and wishes that were there 24×7 like a fort warding off the negativity and lethargy of dreams. I am reminded of these lines. But before, a big thank you to the person who gave me these lines which have, kind of, become the lines of my life

“lehron se darr kar nauka paar nahi hoti,

himmat karne waalon ki kabhi haar nahi hoti,

nanhi cheeti jab daana lekar chadhti hai,

chadhti deewaron par sau baar fisalti hai,

mann ka vishwaas rago mein sahas bharta hai,

gir kar chadhna, chadh kar girna…haan akharta hai,

aakhir uski mehnat bekaar nahi hoti,

koshish karne waalon ki haar nahi hoti…


doobkiyaan sindhu mein gotakhor lagatey hain,

ja ja kar khali haath laut aate hain,

milte naa sahaj hi moti paani mein,

behta duguna utsah isi hairani mein,

mutthi uski khaali har baar nahi hoti,

himmat karne waalon ki kabhi haar nahi hoti.

 

asafalta ek chunauti hai, sweekar karo…

kya kami reh gayi, dekho aur sudhaar karo,

jab tak naa ho safal, neend chain ki tyaago tum…

sangharshon ka maidan, chod mat bhaago tum

kuch kiye bina hi jay jay kar nahi hoti

himmat karne waalon ki kabhi haar nahi hoti…”

More than anything, I have learned the power of not giving up- on my happiness, on my efforts, on my smile, on my life… I will make sure this happiness stays…this pride and the smiles that I accidentally brought on to a few faces, stays. For all the trust and love… thank God for the wonderful people and the wonderful moments u have given me…nothing else I ask of u :) …just these thank yous I have.

CAT Diaries

sitting for CAT…bass 3 din aur (i tried putting a smiley but could not find the exact one that would depict my state at the moment)

my journey began last year…seems like i wasted a lot of time not studying for it. but, there is no use crying over spilled milk…even Rowling’s magic won’t be able to bring it back to the bowl. but it has been nice never the less…career launcher has been a great milestone in my acad journey….not sure whether i’ll be able to get through this year or not. but, the association has been wonderful. more then the ratios and proportions of numbers, i got to know the angles and theorems that cover life…

met some wonderfully wonderful people on my way…people who changed the way i look at life…great teachers who motivated and inspired, who emphasized the importance of not giving up the fight…

these lines have always fascinated me

” stick to the fight when you are hardest hit,

it’s when things are worst that you must not quit, rest if u must but do not quit”

and..i have understood this better than ever with CL.

the events, the workshops, the teaching sessions…they are experiences and memories. moments that taught me the importance of wholesome learning, of intellect and knowledge and not mere knowing…that told me where i stand in the midst of all this (nowhere…no wholesome learning :P )

some friendships strengthened during this journey…some instances that have become eternal. though i never quite enjoyed studying for CAT, i liked the peregrination that i did, from knowing nothing to knowing something.

3 days from now, life won’t be very different. the sun will be the same, the sky will be the same, the breaths will be same. it is a test of not what i know but who i am…and that ‘who’ part takes a lifetime to develop. so…it will let me know where i need to go in life..it will tell me how i will reach that point…waiting for the kill..that will let me understand me better, understand life better :)

 

To the men who taught me to believe in God…

i thank god really…for the day he brought these two people on earth…

i believe, have always believed, that we all have a purpose in life, both ours and others. i don’t know the purpose of my life yet, but i do know what purpose i have in some people’s lives (perhaps)…some though, not all.

i feel great to have loved God differently each day of my life…more than yesterday and less than tomorrow. miles to go before i sleep…that’s what i am reminded of because my belief and faith are going to increase ten fold by the time it’s twilight. and for all this…i thank two people…two very beautiful people who entered at different times but perhaps will never exit from my life ever…

one taught me to believe in God. i used to be an idiot…begging for every small little thing: “bhagwaan ji, aaj ye dedo…kal se aise kar dena…mujhe ye chahiye toh bass chahiye”…like a child throwing tantrums. no wonder they never worked :P . but, he taught me the sheer importance of the profound presence in our lives. he taught me the way to pray, to not always ask for things but always give away as the highest form of prayer, to say “God, i have done this for him. please make sure that the concerned person is happy if he deserves to be”. “dete jaao…as much as u are capable of” rest will be taken care of. i owe my present self to that great human being. God is not the machine that grants wishes. thank God that God has editing powers over our prayers :) :)…warna kuber ka khazana bhi khali ho jaata.

God is the driving force behind our existence. do not keep asking him for things. he will give u what u deserve even without u asking for it, without fail. u may forget him but he will always remember you…in short, he introduced me to God.

the other one. equally beautiful. equally equally equally..everything. he came when, i will never forget. he will go? never i think…some people live beyond existence. they are of them. beyond the limits of time. moving on…he taught me what i gain by being spiritual in some small, minute little corner of my soul. he reminded me the sheer beauty of believing in God (strengthened actually…i never forgot it in the first place). he showed me how u fall in love with yourself all over again when you have faith in him…on a lighter note, he made me realize my appreciation of spirituality as the most appealing of all attributes that mortal people can harbor, as the most valuable part of the soul. he reminded me how things become easy when we have unfailing faith in Him.

apne liye toh sab karte hain…dil khol ke karte hain. kisi aur ke liye kuch karne mein jo mazaa hai, not there in anything else in the world…in short, he made me like myself more than before by showing what it feels to do something for someone…because that is exactly when we do something for God, kinda simplifying his work(euphemism for altruism).

there are many people who add immense beauty to my life…these two are among the few who have taught me to appreciate that beauty, to behold the colors of the rainbow called life…eternally thankful to you(if u are reading it).

Teachings…

you teach me to laugh…..you teach me to cry
you teach me to live…..you teach me to die

you teach me to love with all my heart
you teach me to hate with all my love

the limits of the sky…..the depth of the sea
you teach me to be..everything i want to be

the constant struggle…the never ending troubles
‘ go beyond the vistas..m there if u wobble’

you teach me the value…of failed expectations
you teach me the profoundness..of ideal inspirations

but most of all..u teach my life
it needs to be lived to the full size
you teach me so much..it brings in humility
it brings in respect…joy and humanity

….i thank all those people in my life who have taught me something or the other..this is for u guys…

Happy Teacher’s Day

Teachers' Day

Disclaimer: Some of the below aren’t my words. But it all said ‘anonymous’!

The word “GURU” is untranslatable. Neither the word ‘teacher’ nor the word ‘master’ has the beauty. In fact, the phenomenon of the word is so intrinsically Indian that no other language can translate it. In Sanskrit, ‘Gu’ means ‘darkness’ and ‘Ru’ means the one who dispels it. Thus, Guru literally means “The Light”

The grace of the Guru is like an ocean. If we come with a cup, we will get a cupful. There is no use of complaining about the niggardliness of the ocean. The bigger the vessel, the more we can carry.

It is said that teachers are those who confer immortality to us lesser mortals, in the name of knowledge, through their wisdom. I could not agree less…teachers are like stones cast into the pool of time. Though they themselves may disappear, their ripples extend to eternity. That is why it is said, “If you plan for a year, plant a seed. If you plan for ten years, plant a tree. If you plan for hundred years, teach the people. When you sow a seed once, you reap a single harvest. When you teach people, you will reap a hundred harvests.”

These are some of my favorite lines that I dedicate to every teacher who has made a lasting impact on my life – “We owe you a debt we try to repay but never quite succeed. For you believed in us and had hopes for us. You flung wide doors for us and hoped we will get through. Most of us have drifted into very ordinary paths. The ones you showed seemed quite uphill..the end very distant at times. But whenever we succeed in anything, however small it might be, we smile toward you. It may not be the fabulous bouquet we meant for you. But take these lesser flowers”.

Thank you for being there. We are because you are.

Happy Father’s Day

WHY GOD MADE FATHERS???

for everyone upon this earth
god made a father who
would lovingly watch over
his family as it grew

a father to protect his child
from goblins in the night
with comforting assurances
and hugs so very tight

to teach his child what’s right and wrong
and work that must be done
to share each great adventure
with laughter, tears and fun

yes, God in his great wisdom
looked down from heaven above
and made a father for each child
to cherish and to love