Calcutta is Love!

Yes it is. And what a feeling it is, to be writing this from my second home, my Calcutta, my room in the city which is witness to a version of me that only I had the privilege to see. A version that I saw through the 85 years old yet “shiny-as-new” mirror in an equally old, “built during the British times” building that still stands, a little less strongly, but in well-preserved pride and glory. Such is the Calcutta I know. It stands tall on its heritage, it takes pride in the era gone by. The city breathes its past to sustain its present. It keeps you bound to your roots, while giving you all the chances in the world to fly. We Calcuttans have a saying – “Once a Calcuttan, always a Calcuttan”. I have found it to be very true. Calcutta is love. The essence never goes out. Any walk in any part of the world, reminds me of my Park Street strolls. Any bookstore anywhere, reminds me of College Street. Any boat ride anywhere, reminds me of Dakshineshwar, Belur Math and Princep Ghat. Any happy conversation anywhere with a friend, reminds me of the conversations I have had with some of my most favorite people in the coffee shops of Calcutta. Some I don’t talk to anymore. Some don’t talk to me anymore. What would I not give to talk to some of them again! 🙂 … A city is all about the people you have memories of in the streets of the city, don’t you think?

I know, not many people enjoy the slow, laid back Calcutta, the Calcutta that holds on to its roots so strongly, the city that is still neck deep in its past stories. Probably they are right. But I am not concerning myself with Economics (ironical, given my profession). It’s the poetry in the city that makes me fall for it every single time. Speed is thrill. Slow is peace. That’s the kind of poetry I enjoy… With a slow rhythm, a beautiful meaning. Something you can hum along while a tram crosses by with its ‘tan-tan’. This city sings to you, a tune that only you can understand – while you are walking on the howrah bridge, or sitting on the banks of the mighty Ganges. While you are having a quiet breakfast at Flury’s or while standing at the edge of the local train compartment to feel the wind in your hair (and dust in your eyes!). This city sings to you while you live in it. I think every city has a song. Calcutta has Nobel price winning “Rabindra Sangeet”. Not everyone’s cup of tea, but those who get it never find anything more soothing that could talk to their souls. I don’t know about the people of Calcutta in general. They are okay I think. My two and a half years of doctoral studies have taught me not to generalize without concrete proof and rigorous validation. But I know about the specifics. And they are brilliant! Calcutta and the people it gave me, have made me who I am.

Like the old British building I live in. It keeps you bound to your roots, but also nurtures you. Like grandparents do. It is not a backward city. It is a city that knows speed is not everyone’s answer. It is a city that loves you like your nani. While giving you history lessons, it teaches you to learn from the past, and grow with the realization – “home is where the heart is”. Calcutta steals not the easy hearts, but the difficult ones, I guess. It keeps those who know how to rest. Maybe it’s not good for the city. But I don’t think Calcutta has ever cared about opinions. And that’s the kind of people it breeds. Carefree and beautiful. That’s the kind you find in the city of Joy. Thank you second home for all the love and lovely memories, for the literature and the books, for the losses and the lessons, for your sheer yet subtle beauty. You heal me a little every time I step in. You are love! (P.S – I have lost count of how many times I have written and deleted this post in my head. Finally, it’s up.)

Which Sadness is Sadder Is something I can never decide upon… I am someone who gets all sentimental during movies and books. I cried while reading the ‘Kite Runner’, I cried for an hour when ‘Sirius died’, then Hedwig, Fred, Dobby & so many more. When I reached the point in ‘The Oath of the Vayuputras’ where Sati was about to die, I actually had to shut the book because I was not in a place where I could shed a tear (inside the metro). Senti much! And don’t even get me started on movies. Three Idiots gives me a constricted throat even today. Who else can cry in that movie! It was comedy no? I cried when I was watching ‘The Bucket List’. That one too :/

But today, I saw ‘My Sister’s Keeper’ (written by Jodi Picoult, now a motion picture) & I had to pause the movie where Kate walks up to her father before leaving for prom. I had to. You would know why if you watch the movie. (Do watch. Amazing it is) … This movie reminded me of a friend of mine, Akankshya. She was my junior at school. And she is someone I look up to because she is one of those who braved Leukemia with a smile and a maturity that people thrice her age do not possess. After watching the movie, I wrote to her:

Saw My Sister’s Keeper. Beautiful! At one point had to pause. I was crying so much. It reminded me of you.
There is so much more in the world that is heart breaking, painful, sad yet beautiful. And we cry about stupid things and useless stuff. Sometimes I find it difficult to categorize grief. It’s like – No one can ever decide what problem is big enough to cry about… For how long! Is someone’s death the pinnacle of grief? Or simply breaking up is enough to keep crying. It is like- I can’t decide which sadness is sadder.

Everyday a 1000 thoughts and more run a marathon in my mind. Some run a 400m race, some do a 100m sprint & some have made a permanent home. Not all of them are happy thoughts (that’s okay! You gotta have balance in life). And the newspapers don’t help the cause either. Everything adds to the sad thoughts. I have not yet reached a stage where I can deeply contemplate the not so happy happenings of the world & end up being sad with all the problems around me; the issues of women safety, world poverty, ruthlessness etc etc. I see people crying over broken relationships, things not happening the way they want it to be, their careers not working out, their plans not working out, their love lives not working out. Some are in grief because they cannot be with the person they love, some are in grief because they do not have a job & their life has come to a dangerous standstill, at the edge of a cliff from where a free fall could happen anytime, some are in grief because a lot in their life depends on how they fair in an exam, some are lamenting the loss of a loved one, some are fearing the loss of a loved one, some are in grief because they are suffering from financial or health problems, there are whole countries which are in grief… from where I see, everyone has some or other kind of grief in life. I belong to these ‘some people’ too.

I am wondering whether we can categorize it, or measure it? I am befuddled – how much grief should attract how much sadness? Which kind of sadness is more sadder? Can we really compare the griefs of two people? Losing a loved one hurts the same as having a break up or is it different? The realization that you will never have the ‘forever together’ thing with the person you love is more sad or knowing that a you need to give up and move on is more sad? Looking at all the pain and hurt in the world – should you be depressed or should you look at the happy moments and smile and be happy about it? This is one question to which I have never had the answer. But for now, and for always, I am going to believe the following : I read somewhere that a loss is a loss. It does not matter whether you lost it to life or death, it would hurt equally. Why, then, is it said that – if everyone keeps their problems on a plate, you would withdraw yours very fast because you would realize that others have had it much harder? Maybe because it is all about – the place from where we see it. Maybe it is the magnitude and the number of people who suffer along with us – that is different. Maybe we need to see the whole picture. I know I am not saying anything new. I am just re-affirming my own belief by putting it in writing. But you know … it always works. Looking at someone else’s suffering when you can’t bear your own, makes your own grief seem kinda small in value. And this helps you overcome it. But most importantly because, maybe it is true. So, while every grief hurts equally, I think that believing that others have had worse, or are going through worse, somewhere gives us the power & courage to face our problems; because this realization makes our problems look smaller in our own eyes. It makes us feel small for having cried over stuff that was absolutely capable of having moved on from. It makes us realize that – in the end, we are not alone. That there are millions who have suffered this along with us. That someone must have written about it, found a solution even if it is not one that soothes our heart most. I think categorizing or comparing is unjust. But we may make an effort towards overcoming it – even if we have to believe that we are better off. Someone else had worse. And above all, I do believe that it is not really difficult to find rainbows in life. We just need to allow sunlight through those drops of grief and sadness that we mostly lock away in the darkest chambers of our heart. Because, it always could have been much worse than it already is. But it is not.

This is Akankshya’s post after I wrote to her today (This & more about how she braved Leukemia, her thoughts and life post cancer can be found on her blog. Do read..) – “My Sister’s Keeper & I” P.S – Getting senti on not so senti movies and books is okay right? Can’t help it though 😛 

10 Dialogues My 100th post. Yay! 😀

I love quotes. 10 dialogues from movies. 10 of my favorite dialogues about love. Read on!  

George: “Hey, would you, uh, love me the rest of my life?”

 Lace: “No. I’m gonna love you for the rest of mine.”                                                                              – Phenomenon

“If you ever want something badly, let it go. If it comes back to you, then it’s yours forever. If it doesn’t then it was never yours to begin with.”

                                                                              – Indecent Proposal

William: “I live in Nothing Hill. You live in Beverly Hills.Everyone in the world knows who you are. My mother has trouble remembering my name.”

Anna: “I’m also just a girl, standing in front of a boy, asking  him to love her.”

                                                                                – Notting Hill

“The best love is the kind that awakens the soul and makes us reach for more, that plants a fire in our hearts and brings peace to our minds and that’s what you’ve given me.”                                                                                  – The Notebook

“Perhaps it is good to have a beautiful mind, but an even greater gift is to discover a beautiful heart.”                                                                                             – A Beautiful Mind

“Look, I guarantee that we’ll have tough times. And I guarantee that at some point, one or both of us will want to get out of this thing. But I also guarantee that if I don’t ask you to be mine I’ll regret it for the rest of my life. Because I know in my heart, you’re the only one for me.”                                                                                      – Runaway Bride

“It’s not because I’m lonely, and it’s not because it’s New Year’s Eve. I came here tonight because when you realize you want to send the rest of your life with somebody, you want the rest of your life to start as soon as possible.”

                                                                                                 – When Harry met Sally

“We need a witness to our lives. There’s a billion people on the planet… I mean, what does any one life really mean? But in a marriage, you’re promising to care about everything. The good things, the bad things, the terrible things, the mundane things… all of it, all of the time, every day. You’re saying ‘Your life will not go unnoticed because I will notice it. Your life will not go un-witnessed because I will be your witness’.”

                                                                                      – Shall We Dance

“Someone once told me that the power in all relationships lies with whoever cares less, and he was right. But power isn’t happiness, and I think that maybe happiness comes from caring more about people rather than less.”

                                                                                 – Ghosts of Girlfriends Past

“I’m gonna treat you so nice, you’re never gonna let me go.”

                                                                                                                                                                                                                             – Pretty Woman

Add your favorite ones too with a comment 🙂

Lambent Love


A friend once told me ‘I like lambent love’. That statement never quite left me. And I guess it never will.

For the vocabulary challenged people, lambent means “running or moving lightly over a surface” which translates to “dealing lightly and gracefully with a subject” if you talk about love.

Lambent love would then be, like the warmth which dances beautifully on the edge of the candle. If you put your hands in the middle of the candle wick, all you would get is a burn. Why would you be someone who loves their own miseries and finds solace in their deepest depressions and troughs! It is like developing a Stockholm syndrome. Now who would want that? On the other hand, you can always enjoy the outer halo of a candle. It gives you joy, you can play with it and most importantly, it gives you the warmth that you can handle and not the burns which scar you.

Why shouldn’t love be like that? Soft and easy. Not demanding, not complaining, not nagging, not high on expectations! Why can’t we love more like we breathe. Why can’t it be simple. I know the love nazis around me would say ‘You have never been in love. Who are you to decide whether it is that simple or not?’ Frankly dear, I don’t give a damn. I’m a sucker for the kind of love I believe in; for the lambent kind.

I somehow never understood the mad, passionate love which existed sans a need to be someone, to have an individuality, a name, a storehouse of value that you create for others. I somehow never understood the love that requires a lot of pursuing, cajoling, convincing, compromising, confronting and a thousand other Cs for that matter.

As I said, I am a sucker for the kind of love I believe in. If it does not inspire you, it is not worth it. If, your conversations have 90% of thoughtful talking which is aimed at not saying something that might hurt the other person and result in you spending probably the next few hours placating them, it is not worth it. If you can’t speak your mind, it is not worth it. If you cannot talk sense, cannot talk value, it is not worth it. If you cannot share with each other your future plans which involve what you are going to do individually and not what color would you choose for the curtains of your ‘together’ house, it is not worth it (that color can still be decided when you actually go shopping. Inspiration won’t wait).

Lambent love, is so beautiful because; it gives you the ability to NOT fall in love with the idea of falling in love, it saves you from the OCD of love. Rather, it helps you build a sensibly impeccable world around you and your loved one which has enormous space for all your people. Lambent love gives you and your special someone a beautiful opportunity to look forward together in a common direction, gives you a common passion – a passion to find your own self.

I have always believed, “That which does not inspire you and make you a better person is not love. Just attraction, fatal attraction”. Lambent love is what gives you the power to rise above the pettiness in love (which is mostly prevelant these days) and hence inspires you. It’s like – you really like someone, they make you want to be someone better. How would this ‘want to be better’ ever diminish till you continue to exist, irrespective of whether the person who ignited that fire is there or not!

A candle never extinguishes itself out. It keeps on burning, flames swaying lambently even if the source of ignition moves away. It burns to give light till its last drop of wax and last strand of wick (if the wind Gods don’t interfere i.e.). It lives till its last breath to do what it was created to do – fill the world with its own little light, create a dent with its own little strength.

If you want to love, love like that. Be lambent. Be awesome. For, love is not a fight always. Sometimes, it is the courage to let the other person love you back, to let the other person come to terms with their own true self before they embrace you, accept you, forgive you. Sometimes, love is just like enjoying the warmth of the candle top, like playing with playful fire, like letting go and holding on to your self only. Sometimes, love is just lambent.

I wish I could…

i wish

I wish I could show you,
The depth of my love
I vouch it would beat a 1000 Marianas*
And reach a 1000 skies above.

I wish I could tell you,
How your love adds serenity
Alas! There’s no measurement
Perhaps, it is like infinity.

I wish I could find words,
To tell you how I feel
But, words would limit my world
Which is beyond all vistas, and too surreal.

I wish I had the courage,
To let you go away
But I know, this I have to do
I am sure, I too will move away.

I wish I would ever fall in love again,
I know that’s impossible too
For women love only once
There’s nothing much I can do!

* Marianas : Refers to Mariana trench which is the deepest part of the World’s oceans, located in the western Pacific Ocean.

P.S : It’s an old poem. Found it while looking for other things which I obviously couldn’t find 🙂


My Happiness Jar

I started my happiness jar recently; And every time something really happy happens, I add a word in it. Just to keep a record of how beautiful a few days were that went by. Try it. Colorful little chits that hold memories of colorful days of life.

As I started to add to it daily, I couldn’t help but realize that it really were the small small things in a day that made me the happiest : met a friend after ages, had a good day of work, came up with some brilliant ideas & implemented some, came across some real good inspiration and felt moved, got some really good praise & felt appreciated. Small things. Big smiles 😀

There was love in each little happiness. Even when it was work related, it was the love of doing something I liked doing. We often question the super power called ‘love’ & its abilities to move the world, set things straight, bring smiles, make us feel good. All my questions got answered when I got the chance to attend INK 2012 at Pune in October this year. It is said that when you really seek an answer, it will present itself to you in the most unexpected way possible. I will tell you how:

I went as a volunteer and the whole volunteer pool was allowed to attend the opening day of INK. Brilliant! Glad that I got to listen to maybe the best of the lot of speakers and fellows on the 1st day itself. Have even shared the Awesome Shankar Tucker’s The Awesome song (in my opinion) in my previous post. But there are things that move you differently.  Sometimes, you get caught unawares and things blow you away when you least expect.

One of the speakers at INK was Dr. Nitin Ron, a neonatalogist and a mountaineer. Queer combination isn’t it. But when he started speaking, every word made my being at INK ‘worth it’. Here was a doctor who healed premature babies and helped them live on. And he was telling a full house that science wasn’t enough maybe. Love & compassion played a very very important part in their healing. The stories of miracles which happened at his hospital moved everyone in the audience. It moved them, I’m sure, from a position of doubt (if any) to a position of concrete belief that love heals. Perhaps faster than time. His talk can be viewed here – Nitin Ron at INK

Anyway, coming back to why I started writing this post – I was trying to just figure out what love is for me. And I found out that –

Love is about having that one special person in your life who is ‘the sin qua non(sole purpose) of your existence’. Yet, it is also about  NOT HAVING that one person, because then you find many people who make it worth it – in their own different and beautiful ways! (simply put – it means love can also be there in your life while you enjoy singlehood) 😉

Love is when you can be silent and yet have a beautiful conversation with your own self. Only you know best; who it is that you love most and what you could do for them. I have realized; it is really not important to talk always. Sometimes, you acknowledge someone’s presence more in silence. Because then it means that the person makes you comfortable in your own skin.

Love is when I hold my best friend’s hand and give her a tight hug when I meet her after ages. Love is when I crack the silliest jokes with her and an instant flashback happens. Love is also when I scream with rage at another bestie whom I couldn’t meet. Love is weird really.

Love is when I care like a child for a few people who inspire me and are the reason I am what I am today. Love is when my mom makes the best things in the world for me yet keeps scolding me for some reason or the other. Love is when dad cracks a joke about me getting married and I get angry and then he cracks another joke to make me laugh. Love is when my always silent brother talks so much in front of me that I have to ask him to keep quiet! And mom says, “stay back. At least he talks when you are around.”

Love is when we release sky lanterns with a hope that there is a better tomorrow for all of us. Love is also when we release sky lanterns because we find them beautiful without any reason.

Love is when I realize that there is someone who cares for me so much that I am convinced nothing will ever go wrong with me.

Love is when I unknowingly crack the shittiest jokes and suddenly the whole atmosphere around lights up. Love is when my mom joins me in those silly jokes.

Love is when I realize that I have one person with to whom I do not have to write my inhibitions and emotions. Love is when I know that I’m so comfortable with her that I can say things to her which I will probable share in writing with others 🙂

Love is also when I read a beautiful book and it just makes my day and night and a few more days to come.

Love is happiness. Inside my little jar. In small words and their big meanings. Inside my Happiness Jar.

An excerpt from the book ‘This Is All I Have To Say’ by Swapan Seth; on Love (A serious recommendation that this book be read. If nothing, it will make you smile like an idiot for an hour after you shut it). You may ask why this excerpt. Because – you always need to be open to love & not close your heart. Whatever might have happened ever, never forget to love. Because that is all that matters. Read on :

Suddenly from a crowd of people, it will spot you.
Lurking as it invariably does behind a curtain of hesitation. Wondering whether you will recognize it or reciprocate it.
If it makes you skip a beat, go out and embrace it.
Love is life’s glue. It is what binds people.
Love with desire. Love with dignity. And love deeply.
Love fiercely. And love fairly.
Many are lucky in love. And many are unlucky.
Don’t worry about that. You will fall in and out of love.
Love is unreliable.
It has many disguises that confuse people.
Get confused. Get deceived.
But don’t get cynical about love.
It takes its time to find you.
It searches the universe before it gets to you.
And when its true face stares at you in the eye,
Hug it and make it your friend.
Because love is a life long companion.
Not everyone is lucky to have it.
Most people tuck away their love in their hearts.
Wear yours on your sleeve.
But be unfaithful.
Love many things.
Love your family. Love your friends.
Love your interests. love your work. Love a book.
Love a tune. Love a poem. Love a wine.
Love a flower. Love a work of art. Love a smell.
Love a place. And be generous with your love.
The more you will give, the more you will get.
And love unconditionally. Love is not a contract.
It is merely an obligation to being alive.
And never expect love to come back in volumes in which you give it to others.
There’s always a little that spills as it journeys back to you.

Because, love isn’t about who was, is or will be there in your life. It is about who are YOU.

My favorite definition of ‘Soul Mate’

I think I write a lot about love. Probably because there is so much of it around and so many people around in love, that one ends up learning a thing or two purely out of vicarious experience.

I remember telling a friend about my list of favorite love stories which has 2 stories as of now. One is a fiction story, another is a real one! I will not talk about the real one because I don’t want to be hunted down by the two beautiful people involved in it for wrapping it up in one post. It is their story and deserves a whole book probably. And words would do no justice to what they have together. But I would love to share the fiction one.

Those who know me really well would know which one I am talking about. It is ‘Snape’s story from Harry Potter’. The love story that has changed the meaning of the word ‘Always’ for all its readers and will ‘always’ continue to inspire me. For the potterheads, the lines – ‘After all these years?’ ‘Always’ make up for the most awesomest love story of their lives. His story reminds me of a superb one liner from the movie “Namaste London”:

“Ishq di mere mitra pehchan ki;
Mit jaaye jadon zid apnaan di”

(There could be many many pages for the explanation of the above couplet. But for now let’s just say, it means – the hallmark of, for the lack of a better word, ISHQ, is the absence of the urge to own the person you love.)

The love story taught me this one beautiful lesson – ‘If it takes leaving the person you love for the sake of love, do that. But, never stop living your life if you don’t get the years of togetherness you have always wanted for yourself. Surely, the one who loved you and couldn’t be with you for some reason would not have wanted you to stop living. The whole idea of love is to inspire you to be better. Whether you get to be with the person or not.’

And this brings me to an excerpt from another of my favorite books, Elizabeth Gilbert’s ‘Eat Pray Love’ –

 “People think a soul mate is your perfect fit, and that’s what everyone wants. But a true soul mate is a mirror, the person who shows you everything that is holding you back, the person who brings you to your own attention so you can change your life. 


A true soul mate is probably the most important person you’ll ever meet, because they tear down your walls and smack you awake. But to live with a soul mate forever? Nah. Too painful. Soul mates, they come into your life just to reveal another layer of yourself to you, and then leave. 


A soul mates purpose is to shake you up, tear apart your ego a little bit, show you your obstacles and addictions, break your heart open so new light can get in, make you so desperate and out of control that you have to transform your life, then introduce you to your spiritual master…” 

A soul mate could have never been summed up in a better way, a love story never explained in a better way(Snape’s love for Lily)… True, love is all about understanding yourself before you commit to a lifelong of companionship with someone else. And that is why, maybe, love should come easily to all of us..but doesn’t 🙂 … Because, probably we misunderstand ourselves the most, lie to ourselves the most!



Have you ever really loved a Woman…

I am sure you have heard this awesome song by Bryan Adams. If not, do it now –HERE .But before, do complete the post. For, I have found no better way to understand what love is for a woman.

– If your lady loves you, really loves you, she will be very vulnerable in your presence. And if you really love her, don’t let her be so vulnerable ! Be a strength for her, not a weakness and show her that you are a strength.

– If your lady loves you, she will always want to hold hands, lie down with arms around you, just want you to hold her (may be not beyond always). If you lover her, oblige 50% of the times. Don’t spoil her habits ! :P

– Your lady will always appreciate a kiss on the forehead more than anywhere else(I know what u are thinking & I am not venturing into that part here ;) ). Make it sudden, more frequent and longer. She will be yours forever. Somehow it does mean a lot to them.

– Your lady will always want a passionate hug after the end of a tiring day. Don’t spoil it by doing whatever everytime !! Let her melt away as long as she wants to. It is these moments that they remember most :)

– Notice her in silence. It is her small nuances that will make you understand her. Yes, saying is important. But, sometimes a silent conversation is easier to put across your emotions. Hold her, listen to her heartbeats. They speak louder than words. Let her hold you. Trust me you do not need words to talk.

Mean a lot to her in your own special way. Do not ever use raised voices. However strong she might be, be tender. It is difficult only when we put a lot of effort. Because, love as I believe – is one of the most effortless emotions. You just have to be true to yourself.

My fav lines from the song… Hear every thought, See every dream
Give her wings, when she wants to fly. 

The Love Thing

The title reminds me of the book ‘The thing called love’ … I faintly remember the story I guess. Correct me if I am wrong, it talks about ‘true love’ apparently. So many true loves around where the truth changes mirror every other day !

I was just remembering a few ‘so called’ ‘awesome’ love stories around me in the past few years. All had a pattern. First few days of courtship were like – ‘no one else in this world exists’ . After 3 months – ‘ok. I have other things to do’ . After that – ‘Dear ! why the hell do u exist’ 😛

I am not sure if I am right or not, but I believe, every relationship needs a base of friendship. I am so reminded of the dialogue from the movie ‘Kuch Kuch Hota Hai’ which was – ‘Pyaar dosti hai. Agar woh meri sabse acchi dost nahi bann sakti, toh main ussey kabhi pyaar kar hee nahi sakta’ 

Arey ! call nahi kiya toh nahi kiya. Kisi aur ko dekh liya toh dekh liya. Late ho gaya toh ho gaya. Trust your better half with the fact that, however much he/she roams around, at the end he/she is going to come back to you. Because if he doesn’t, there might be no point in waiting /wasting time.

Life is not the thing to be wasted in trivialities. It is when these small and not at all important issues came up; that I also saw the worst of fights in the awesomest of relationships. Why give so much of an emotional hangover to the one person you are most emotionally attached to ? Why make the other person feel the knots of the strings you are attached with ?

Love, as I see it is much more than just being available for each other. It is more about being available for a 3rd reason as I was told by someone. And true it is. If your relationship doesn’t have a common purpose, making it work might just be a tough call, a drag.

Ok. Love is important. But life needs more. It is the things that love makes you do that constitute life. One could do wonders but not without purpose. Be it love. Be it life.

Being foolishly in love will take not take anyone, anywhere. Because, again I heard it somewhere :

Love is not the heart of life. It is just a part of life.

The day it is more love and less friendship in any relationship, is the day the love graph starts declining 🙂